I’m still rattling ideas around, getting lost and frustrated, but slowly slooooooooowly pulling things together. Remember when “word of the year” was really trending? I don’t do that anymore, but am thinking anyways of one year in particular when i found myself: 2012 the year of “Origin”, going back to old ideas and techniques, staying true to myself, letting myself rest. I need to do that again. Because seriously, the months since completing Tabula Memoria have been one long nasty picnic of doubt, self loathing, frustration, boredom and, yes, even Anger with myself. (Don’t get me wrong: i love that piece, but it took a LOT out of me, something i didn’t realize was happening at the time.)
Certain things keep popping into view in old files, in Flickr and my private blog, and i do believe it’s time to work ’em again/finally.
From 2011, this weaving idea has been pinned up and removed from the inspiration board so many times it now has a fine cloud of holes around the edges 🙂
The interpretation is actually going to be a bit different than i originally planned, and involves the harem cloth (and natural dyes) mentioned in a previous post. Also using that fabric in something like this has sparked some ideas:
I loved making Mother’s Heart in 2013, still one of my favourite pieces, and maybe i could shake it/make it on/with the languishing Anno Suturae. (Photo above is when i was auditioning background pieces for MH). Redux’s are always fun as you evolve and riff from them 
I seem to do better/feel more in tune with what i am doing, when seemingly disparate elements are combined, and i feel i’ve misplaced that somewhere in the lat few years.
I have Anno Suturae pinned up rather haphazardly so i can see the whole, check different orientations and decide where to cut, move, remove and add, because it’s time to really combine some ideas. I may even “lose” the stitching that is already on there, as most of the intent is gone. Perhaps it should be renamed Annos Suturae!
My Inner Critic of course is snargling.
“Yeah right, another “Plan”, wonder how long that will last?”
“Oh, you’re just copying yourself again.”
“You obviously don’t have any original ideas anymore. Ha, original, get it: you talked about Origin, but you’re way off base. Ha.”
“It’s easy to sit on the computer and blether about it. When ya acshully gonna get off yer bazotski and do it? Oh yeah, never.”
Going to have to shut that bitch in a box and throw her in the freezing many yards away garage.
albedo too 
Ha, i still have all the “Origin” posts on my private blog to enjoy 🙂
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Not sure that this could even remotely be classed as a valid point (and most probably isn’t!) however…addressing the ‘oh, you’re just copying yourself again’ issue…. I can’t wrap my head around that exactly. Many artists work in series – not copying themselves, but extending an idea, a technique, a process. Does everything that gets created HAVE to be an original idea? And does everything have to be done for the ‘creative artsy’ part of it….maybe sometimes just doing something for the sheer fun of the creating might be just what the heart and soul needs. So what if it’s not something that is put out there for public ‘consumption’ (for lack of a better word)…maybe feeding your soul is something that’s valid too. Just my two cents!
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No, i totally get where you are coming from! Copying one’s self in *my* books/self is when the artist (me) is doing the same thing over and over, without any NEW energy or insight put into them. When they are just re-iterations of the original idea, they’re not a series, but stale work. Liken them to scales–you’re getting practice, but you’re not really playing a tune, and have no real audience. And getting back that “Origin” feeling is what *does* satisfy the heart and soul.
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variations on the theme
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oh and draw as if your life depends on it (I think that was said by Michelangelo to his assistant Angelo) even just a scratchy sketch on the back of an envelope, gets the making moving, but doesn’t work for everyone Old Man Crow composes a song for weeks in his head then plays it
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Absolutely! I think there are more sketchbooks and sketch tools in my bag than anything else 🙂
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Puzzle pieces: All flowers grow on a very similar stem but the resulting flowers are never exactly alike; revisiting older ideas can be like going back and tasting a good spaghetti sauce that has had time to simmer – their focus and shift and story may have changed because you have changed – you had not choice but to change so you see it differently and it can now take you in a different direction. One thing I like about your work is that it evolves – and maybe you travel partly along familiar pathways but there are always new and different addition. it is said that everything works out in the end, and if it is not yet working out – you are not at the end point. Evolution can be very subtle – perhaps you are so close you do not yet notice or sense the difference below the surface – it may look the same but it may have had a different energy incorporated while you worked so will touch the viewer differently. Your inner critic is small and very limited in it’s range of understanding – what you actually do is far beyond it’s tiny world of understanding – don’t let that drive you to being small too – that would be a shame. Trust yourself – you know where you are going.
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Well said, and thank you.
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I agree with MaryAnne. I know what you mean about “copying oneself” there is a particular fibre artist I know who has been doing the same damn thing for at least 15 years, and I don’t understand how a: she continues to get into shows and b: why she isn’t bored with herself. lol
But, BUT – working in a series or finding new tributaries, brooks, and falls whose origin is a single great river – I think there’s a lot of beauty in that for a viewer, and peace and soul healing spirit excitement for the artist.
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There are a few, aren’t there 🙂 There must be a Status Quo niche then, for those galleries/shows that don’t want to rock the boat.
Definitely, personal iconography and symbolism should mean finding new depths in yourself, your expression of them. It’s certain that water never stills, even if the surface looks calm! (I’m of course very partial to your river analogy, Kit 🙂 )
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